Media statement from the Australian Bureau of Meteorology (ABOM)
Excessive Heat Warning!
This summer, we're going to see the hottest temperatures we've seen since last summer. The above temperature map is the scariest map we've ever published.
This is clearly evidence that the climate has changed dramatically, and for the worse, in the last 6 months. The electricity grid can no longer handle the demand and we've been forced to ration supply to control Carbon Emissions™. This is the universal threat that the entire galaxy faces.
The seas will boil, the ice will melt and we'll have to suffer enduring warm beer. This is a crisis Australians never, ever have had to contemplate before the News™ media started reporting in this way.
The only solution to this crisis is to submit to all the climate controlling policies that The Party™ implements for our uncomfortable salvation. Salvation is never easy. Sacrifices have to be made, for The Children™.
Reporting from the Southern Red Paridise Gulag, your correspondent, KKK
Statistics: Posted by Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt — 12/17/2024, 12:10 am — Replies 4 — Views 288